A sad trip for a birthday
by Tea and Shortbreads
Summary: The Doctor is travelling with Donna and Rose and wants to go back to Gallifrey before the Time War.


"You know what?"

"No, we don't!"said a gingerhair woman in her thirties followed by a blond girl.

"I want to go back to Gallifrey"

"Gallifrey?" said Rose the blond girl

"Yep, what's wrong with that?"

"There is no Gallifrey,"

"I know there is no Gallifrey now but I still want to come back and see my planet for one last time."

"Are you telling me you want to come back to Gallifrey just before the Time war against the Daleks?"

"You are so clever Rose."

"Are you insane? Tell him Rose!"said Donna the gingerhair woman

"I don't need to tell him anything, he knows he is crazy but as always he will do as he likes and won't listen anybody."

"Ehhh ladies, I'm glad you take care of me but close to the 1000 years I think I'm old enough to take care of myself and be able to do what I want with no need to ask for permission to anybody."

"Alright Doctor, do as you please but if you get in trouble don't come for help."

"Donna, as always, so nice! A pleasure to have you as a friend. Sometimes you really drive me crazy."

"I just care for you, that's all. Good night." said Donna angry. And then she went to her room in the TARDIS leaving the doctor with Rose Tyler.

"She's right and you know that. Why are you so rude with her, then?"

"Please Rose, not you now. I have had enough with Donna."

"It's just that I love you and I care."

"I know you love me rose and I love you too but honnestly I don't need not only one but two baby sitters. I'm 999 years old and will be 1000 in 2 weeks and for my own birthday present I want to see my planet how it was before the time war when everything was alright. That's all I want. Can you understand that if you love me as you say?"

"I can't"

"Why?"

"Because Donna is right, you are insane. Good night!"

"Rose!"

"I'm tired"

"Good night"

"Yes good night" said the blond girl. And then she left. The Doctor stayed for while next to the console of the TARDIS sad to see none of his two friends, Rose his girlfriend and Donna his best friend support him in his wish to go back to Gallifrey before the time war happened. He switched on one of the screens and started to watch some old pictures of Gallifrey till he felt too tired. He put on standby the console and went to bed. Rose was already fast asleep. He stood next to her hug her and fall asleep in a few seconds dreaming of his own planet...

"Good morning Rose"

"Good morning Doctor. Are you still wanting to go to Gallifrey?"

"Yes, I am. Sorry Rose but nothing will change my mind. Neither you nor Donna."

"Ok, I won't insist. Just take much care. And one little thing I want to come with you in that trip."

"No Rose you can't"

"I will. I am with you for the best and the worst so I will be with you and especially in that journey."

"Right! We talk about that later. Now I need a coffee and some toasts. Is Donna awake already?"

"Don't know, we are still in the room."

They left and went to the tea room of the TARDIS where they found Donna who was already having a cup.

"Sorry for not waiting you."

"No worries. Have you been awake for long?"

"5 am this morning! I haven't slept well."

"Oh sorry! What's wrong?"said the Doctor

"You, I think it's too dangerous for you to go to Gallifrey"

" I like to take risks"

"I'm going with him!"

"So you are crazy too Rose!"

"I want to be with him even in the dangerous moments."

"Ehh Calm down ladies! I won't have any problem and everything will be alright"

"So why this morning you told me I can't come with you?"

"Because I care too much about you Rose, and you Donna if you decide to come too."

"Well I really don't know. I'm scared. Not for me but for you. Anyway, as always you don't and won't listen."

"Really?"

"Yes, really!"

"Great! So you think I'm selfish?"

"I think so!"

"Thank you Donna. As I say yesterday always a pleasure to have you as a friend."

"Doctor, she is right and you know that. You are selfish because you do always what you want and you don't take advice of what she or myself can tell you. And that makes me angry too to see you acting this way."

"Not you Rose, please!"

"Sorry if it hurts to ear the truth but I love you and I care for you."

"Right! Thank you for this lovely chat but now I really need to eat something."

"When do you plan to go to Gallifrey?"

"Don't know, maybe this afternoon or maybe tomorrow. Just need to put a date before the time war and send the TARDIS here!"

"Ok" said Donna leaving the Doctor with Rose...

A couple of hours later.

"I have checked that everything in the TARDIS is OK just in case."

"Just in case of"

"Nothing" said the Doctor to Rose carrying on in preparing the TARDIS."

"Right! See you later."

When Rose was ready to leave the Doctor came close to her and held her in his arms.

"I need you more than ever. I am sorry to say that but yes It's selfish because I am driving you to something that might be dangerous but in spite of that I need you and I need you to be with me during this trip. Are you ready to be with me no matter what could happen?"

"I am, When are we leaving?"

"Tonight at midnight GMT!"

"And Donna?"

"I can't avoid her to take her own decision but I know her, maybe not as much as she knows me, and I think she will come with us too. She likes the danger. I really love her. She is an amazing woman."

"Yes she is."

"Rose, thank you for being always here."

"You're welcome...Doctor tell me about the Time war. What happened?"

"Rose, you really want to know what happened?"

"Yes I want and I think it's good for you to talk about it. It's a good way to expiate what was wrong."

"I'm not ready to talk about it. Sorry Rose."

"Doctor, you are never ready when I ask you something, You always find an excuse for not talking about it. Why? What scares you so much to talk about anything when asked?"

"Because It reminds me of bad and sad things and many of these things happened because of me. I feel guilty."

"You should talk, you know."

"I will one day, I will, but not now!"

"No Doctor, I think you need to talk now. I'm here, I listen. I have all the day."

"Ok, you want to know about the time war?"

"Yes!"

"It's not a fairy tale."

"I know it isn't. I am ready. Start whenever you want."

"Great, a long long time ago there were two people. In one side the Daleks, you know who they are, and in the other side the Time Lords and you also know who they are too. No need more explainations about each of them... And the Daleks wanted to destroy the entire universe and became the own masters of it and put the rest of it under slavery. Everybody accepted that and all became puppets of the Daleks. But there was a race of aliens, the Time Lords, who said no, who told the Daleks they will never accept that and decided to fight. But things got bad and one Time Lord did something really really bad. In the moment he made it he thought that was the best to do but now he knew he was wrong. He destroyed his own planet because he prefered to see his people dead instead of seeing them enslaved by Daleks."...

The Doctor carried on talking to Rose who was now crying while she was listening to him, to her Doctor. When he finished he came close to her and looking at her told her:

"I told you it was sad but you wanted to know."

"I know, don't worry I will be fine. I feel so sad for you."

"No Rose, don't feel sad for me. I made a big mistake. I thought I was right but I was wrong and I have to live forever with that."

"Doctor?"

"yes Rose!"

"You can travel in time, can't you?"

"Yes and what do you mean with that?"

"You can change what happened!"

"I can't it's a fix point in time."

"Come on, I have seen you changing things so many times."

"Yes but not that. I can't. Be sure that I will have already done it if that was possible."

"Ok."

"Thank you Rose. You were right, I needed to talk about it. I feel better. Anger and sadness are still here but now I am not scared to talk about it."

"I don't blame you."

"Oh God!"

"What?"

"It's nearly lunch time. Talking makes me hungry."

"Allons-y! Where si Donna?"

"In her room I guess."...

They arrived to her room and knocked but no answer. Rose opened the door. Nobody was there.

"Well she might be already in the living room maybe or in the kitchen."

"Yes sure. Rose I love to be with you"

"Me too Doctor."

"Hey! Where were you both?"

"In the library talking. And you?"

"In my room watching some tv."

"Anything interesting?"

"Yeah, Eastenders."

"Really? I remember to have watched some when I was still in my first appearance."

"Yes, they still doing it!"

"Right right! Glad you enjoyed it but we are all hungry I guess. Donna, I know you know a lot of good restaurants in London, tell me one and we go there for lunch."

"Well I know one but if we haven't booked I don't think we will have a table."

"Donna, I'm the Doctor!"

"Yes I know that."

"Tell me then the name of the restaurant."

"The Magic Cauldron"

"Funny name for a restaurant."

"They opened it because of Harry Potter."

"I love Harry Potter. I have read all the books. They are amazing. And how is the food?"

"Excellent, they have 2 stars in the Michelin Guide."

"Well not too bad. Rose are you ready?"

"I am."...

"Hello I'm John Smith, I would like a table, a good one, for this two ladies and myself."

"Sorry we don't have anyleft."

"Really, I'm the new general manager of the Michelin Guide. Your restaurant has 2 stars in my guide. I guess you don't want to have one less in the next edition of it" said the Doctor showing the man in the desk his psychic paper."

"Please Mr Smith, my apologies. Nice to see a pleasure to have someone from the Michelin Guide."and watching the young man"Get ready the best table of the restaurant for Mr Smith, the one with the view to the Thames."

"Thank you Mr Jones."

Once they were installed at the table drinking a cup of champagne,

"You see Donna, I told you I was the Doctor. Not only we have the best place of the restaurant but I am pretty sure they will invite us."

"You are amazing!"said Donna and Rose all together.

"I know!"

The lunch they were having was incredible.

"I have never eaten something so good."...

"Everything's allright Mr Smith?"said Mr Jones the manager coming to see them.

"Yes, delicious!"

"Happy to hear that."

"Mr Carter who was the ancient general manager told me your restaurant was excellent but I couldn't imagine he was so right."

"Thank you. No need to tell you that you are my guests. You are invited."

"Thank you Mr Jones. I am really grateful."...

"Doctor!"

"Yes Donna!"

"Sorry to doubt about you!"

"No worries Donna."

They spent nearly 3 hours savouring all the delicious meals of the Gourmet menu. Rose specially enjoyed the pancakes with pink and purple chocolate and the clotted cream with oranges and toffee!

Donna liked the blackcurrent gelly with shortbreads and caramelized carrots. They thank Mr Jones for this good lunch and went back to the TARDIS. It was already 6 PM.

"Donna, what are you going to do?"

"About what?"

"Gallifrey."

"I don't want to let you, I'm as scared as you, but I will come. I want to see once in my life your planet."

"Great! We leave at midnight."

"Alright!"

"Who wants a cup of tea"said Rose

"Me"..."and me" said both Donna and The Doctor...

"And for now I leave you for a while. I need some rest before the big trip. You have all the TARDIS for you. Please don't break me you later here at midnight."

"Yes! I will go and watch a movie at the cinema of the TARDIS. Rose are you coming with me?"

"Yes Rose go with Donna."

Rose looked at the Doctor and these one when he was leaving them whispered to her: "Rose, I really need some rest and to be a moment alone. We will have time for other things when back."

She left him go and cameback to Donna.

"Rose, The Doctor sometimes needs to be alone, you know."

"Yes I know."

They went to the cinema and choose to watch a movie with Marylin Monroe. When it was time after a good chat near the beach they came back to the main room of the TARDIS. It was not yet midnight and obviously the Doctor was still in his room.

"I will go and get him." said Rose

"Rose, leave him, he will come in a moment."

"Donna, I'm scared, I don't want to loose him:"

"I don't want eithet but shhh he is coming"

"Ready?"

"Yes!"

"And you Rose?"

"More than never!"

"Great! The trip may be a little bit moving so you better take a good seat."

"Doctor I want to help you to drive the TARDIS."

"Not now Rose, I have to do it by myself." The Doctor put the coordinates of Gallifrey in the computer. N32 S234 constellation of Kasterborous. September 10. 1914. And the trip started. That will be a long journey back home. The Doctor came close to Rose. Donna was too busy reading a fashion magasine to care of what they were doing now...Suddendly the TARDIS falls in a big air hole and stopped.

"Have we arrived?"

"Well I don't know. I though we will take a longer time but anyway."

The Doctor opened the door of the TARDIS and saw a beautiful red planet.

"And then Doctor?"

"Yes we are in Gallifrey"

"How do you feel?"

"Happy and sad because I know in few days this won't exist anymore."

"You're the Doctor!"

"Yes but I can't do anything and that It's something I can't do. Rose tell her."

"Donna, The destruction of Gallifrey by the Doctor is a fixed point in time and space. You can't change it."

"Really?"

"Yes Donna. Now if you want to come with me I will be grateful to show you my dear Gallifrey."

They left the TARDIS.

"Welcome to Arcadia, capital of Gallifrey. Rose, Donna, look here" said the Doctor pointing in one direction, "this is the Time Lord Academy where I have studied."

"Where you a good student?"

"Psss not really but who cares. At least I haven't became crazy like the Master. I feel so sorry for him. Anyway. Oh look here, that's my house, well my parents house. They are dead."

"Sorry."

"They die before the time War. I am quite happy for that. At least I"

The Doctor suddendly stopped to talk and there was a deep silence. A few seconds later Donna who was always trying to warm the atmosphère said."There isn't any place to eat here?"

The Doctor didn't have time to answer. Far away they heard an explosion and a word they were used to hear.

"EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!"

"Oh no, no nooooo! That's not possible. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"Doctor? What's happening?"

"It's already the Time War. I will see myself fighting against the Daleks and destroy the planet. We need to leave now. Why you didn't tell me not to go?"

"We did!" said Rose and Donna all together and angry with the Doctor.

"I really sorry. Now go back to the TARDIS."

They heard closer to them another "EXTERMINATE" and the Doctor scream to them: "Run and go to the TARDIS now. Close the door and stay inside. Don't worry for me. I will be ok."

"No Doctor, I stay with you. I have said before I will be with you for the best and the worst."

"Rose, you remembered you asked me before why I didn't want you to come? Here you have the main reason. I might loose you and I don't want. So that's why you will go back to the TARDIS now."

"No Doctor, I won't. I'm here and I stay. Donna?"

"I stay!"

"Nothing can stop you?"

"No, not even a time lord!"

The EXTERMINATES were getting closer to them.

"Rose?" screamed the Doctor.

"Do you love me?"

"Yes of course I love you. Why do you ask?"

"So if you love me do as I say and go back to the TARDIS now. Understood!"

"Come, I think it's better we go back to the TARDIS, he can manage himself." said Donna to Rose. Rose sad and angry because she might not see her Doctor again went back to the TARDIS but not before kissing him.

"I love you!"

"I love you too!"

They left him. The Doctor was going to fight in the Time War a war he has already lived. He could see far away the bombs and the lasers of the Daleks and the people of Gallifrey screaming. He wanted to go and stop his first himself and tell him not to destroy the planet but that was impossible. He had been able to change many things in history but he couldn't with this one. He just stand here and watched for the last time in his life his planet, his beautiful Gallifrey. He fighted against a few daleks, at least those won't be able to do anything more. The battle last nearly 30 minutes but in the center of Arcadia, things were getting worse. And then it happened! A big explosion and a smoke covered all the city. The Doctor knew what was happening. He knew who had caused this. That was him. In a few seconds Gallifrey will no more exist. He ran as fast as he could to the TARDIS and enter in it. He didn't say a word to the two women and drive as fast as he could the TARDIS to nowhere and started to cry. He cried and he cried. Rose came closer to him and held his hand.

"Doctor?"

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Rose. I nearly killed you and Donna."

"We are all alright"

"No Rose you don't understand. I put you into the Time War. While you were in the TARDIS I saw the explosion I caused to destroy Gallifrey. I saw how Arcadia got first destroyed. I had just the time to come back to the TARDIS and drive it to nowhere just to escape from that terrible moment."

"I said, we are alright. Don't worry!"

"Rose what had happened if you die or Donna die or I die? Tell me. And now yes you can call me selfish because yes Donna is right. Yes Donna you are right! I am selfish, I do always what I want and when I want and no matter the consequences to others."

"Doctor, We don't blame you and we won't." said Donna giving him a big hug and a cup of hot chocolate. "Drink, you will feel better."

"Thank you Donna."

"Are we safe?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean if we have manage to escape, sorry to talk this way."

"I think so. Hang on" said the Doctor oppening the door of the TARDIS.

"Nooooo." screamed the Doctor

" What's wrong?"said Donna who has followed him.

"I don't like that, I really don't like that and it's all my fault"

"What don't you like?"

"You see these pieces moving all around?"

"Yes."

"That's Gallifrey just after the explosion."

"I don't know what to say, sorry Doctor."

"I don't know either. That's life. I have to live with that forever. At least the Daleks didn't get it."

"You scared me sometimes when you talk, you know?"

"Yes Donna I know."

" Are you going to see your first TARDIS?"

"No my first myself.." said the doctor closing the door of the TARDIS and going back to the console of the spaceship.

"And now Doctor?"said Rose who has listenned all the conversation between them. The Doctor didn't answer and the TARDIS started to move and a couple of hours later arrived at the Powell Estate where Jackie Tyler, Rose's mum lived. The Time lord hadn't said a single word since they left the space where he had seen his planet completly destroyed. He had first left Donna in chiswick,

"Are you leaving me?...Please Doctor, answer me."

"Yes Rose, I'm leaving you."

"You don't love me anymore?"

"That's why I'm leaving you. I nearly lost you. I don't want to give you this kind of life. You deserve a better one."

"But Doctor, I love you. I don't mind, really. I want to be with you forever. I don't care about regenerations and that I will die when I get older."

"Rose, that's the funny part of your life with me."

"Doctor please" A minute, two minutes, three minutes, four minutes and then The Doctor held Rose's hand and whispered to her

"Ok, you know, I can't live without you, I need you. Ready for another trip with me?"

Rose turned to face him and kiss him.

"I'm am." And they left the TARDIS and went to see Jackye.


End file.
